We have come to that time of year again. No, not the State Fair, high school football games, and green leaves turning red and yellow. We have come to the annual avoidance of writing the Christmas play blog post. I’m not sure what it is about the play that gets to me each year, alright so I do. It’s that familiar feeling that I’m sure all writers have. That feeling that they aren’t good enough, or people will think their ideas stupid. Ah, the glamorous life of a writer!
So here for all of you to see are my
top stalling tactics, ahem, I mean my top preparations, for writing the Christmas play.
#1 Get Some Caffeine
We writers (read me) cannot write without caffeine. It is a very well known fact that Shakespeare kept a glass of Diet Coke with him at all times. Or something like that. Remember that one guy, who wrote that one book, and it never became famous? That’s right, he ran out of caffeine.
#2 Make Food
If I wasn’t trying to watch my figure, there would be a few snickers, tootsie roll pops, and peanut M&M’s added to these nachos. Mmmm, peanut M&M’s…..
#Finding A Comfy Writing Spot
Uncomfortable writers don’t write the big sellers, my friend. Or the popular Christmas plays. They write your tax laws. See how important comfort is to a writer?
#4 Finding Some Tunes.
The magazine did an interview with nine writers, and all of them wanted it quiet while they were writing. I’ll bet that they aren’t writing Christmas plays though. For me, there has to be background noise while I’m writing. Especially plays and articles. And grocery lists and playing Words With Friends.
#5 Putting The Dog To Bed
This is a very important step, because while dogs are man’s best friend, they are not exactly a writer’s best friend when they are tired. Especially if said writer like to take them with her on 3 mile walking trips everyday.
#6. Taking A Shower.
There is no actual requirement for showering before writing a Christmas play, but hey if it helps keep your writing relaxed and clean, I say go for it.
#7. Thinking About Watching A Movie
Perhaps you had not noticed, but movies have audio. I know you hadn’t thought of that, and you’re glad I came along to tell you. You don’t have to watch the movie to be entertained. For that reason it’s best to pick a movie you know by heart. Why not listen to the movie commentary? The you can be entertained and and learn valuable things at the same time? Such as how much the movie cost – a lot, and how much the stars liked filming it – a lot, and how many product placements they used – a lot.
#8 Start Laundry
You have to keep on top of your laundry pile, but especially during Christmas play writing season. Because the laundry doesn’t know it is Christmas play writing season. It will grow arms and legs, and walk into your room at night, to ask why you are ignoring it. So it is best to start a load at any time. Or your family will be anti-clothed, and people will laugh.
#8 Take A Look At The Time.
If you think all of these preparations for writing are taking up too much time, well then….you might be right.
#10. Make a Video Of Your Experiences.
#11. Find Some Inspirational Music
If you got my point in #4, you realized not only do I need noise, I also need inspiration. Good music will provide both of these. Sometimes I will be listening to a song, and the whole Christmas play will start to develop. Other times, all that will start to develop is an ear ache from the headphones.
#12. Pull Out The Laptop
This might be one of the most important moments in the Christmas play process. It can be a great thing, to just jump on and get started writing. But more than likely the first tabs that will be opened will be Facebook, Twitter, Youtube, and Email. Also known to your favorite writer as the Four Great Time Wasters.
#13. Writing A Blog Post About Trying To Write A Play….
#14. Tweet About How Tired You Are
#15. Decide To Go Ahead And Read Devotions
And go to bed. As the kiddos start arriving at 6:30 am. There’s always tomorrow, right??
Or maybe there won’t be. I know better, I know to go ahead and take projects on time and head on. But I don’t always do that. Why because I’m human. I get worried, I get scared, and I forget Who I am writing this play about.
See it’s not whether the actors, the pastor, or the audience like the play. It’s whether the King likes it. And since He deemed me good enough to be the steward of this writing talent, I think He expects me to use for Him. I don’t want to make it up to heaven, and hear Him say ‘so that writing gift I gave you, what did you do with that? Nope, I’d rather hear ‘well done.’
I’m going to go spend a little while with Him, and I’ll catch y’all on the flip side, peeps.
Blessings and Peace,